


Eyes Wide Open

by takemedowntown



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: 9x06, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Endgame, Fluff, Love, M/M, Prison, Repressed Emotions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-18
Updated: 2018-10-18
Packaged: 2019-08-03 20:39:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16333058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/takemedowntown/pseuds/takemedowntown
Summary: hi!! I’m back already w another one shot. I’m just so inspired by endgame so all my creativity juices are flowing. It’s crazy what a 50 second scene can inspire.this takes place the morning after 9x06 but also details what I perceived to be going through Ian’s mind during/after the scene. there wasn’t much dialogue but I hope you agree with my take on it.-ash





	Eyes Wide Open

Day 1.

Have you ever woken up but feel like you still must be in a dream? Ian Gallagher has. As soon as he smelled that wonderfully masculine and just fucking warm scent and heard the soft breathing from the man laying in front of him, Ian knew he must be dreaming. There’s just no way.

The events from the day prior flooded through his mind- his last day at home. All he wanted was to feel safe, surrounded by his family and friends for the last time before starting his two year sentence. The goodbye in front of the gates, the failed attempt of levity from Kev and the emotional moment with Lip. 

The hardest goodbye was to his freedom. It’s an odd feeling; just willingly giving up your life by walking into a building and putting on a uniform. Surrendering yourself to the uncertainty of what lies ahead. 730 days. 

He had prepared himself as best as he could. He was prepared to be looked at, talked at, grabbed at. He was prepared to fight if he needed to. He was prepared to deal with the shitty food and the boredom. He was prepared for the mundane tasks and physical labor. He was prepared for the no privacy and the uncomfortable beds. 

What Ian wasn’t prepared for though, was stood at 5’7 with piercing blue eyes. How could he have ever prepared for that? 

Unlike his family, he had said goodbye to this a long time ago. It seemed like it would be forever. No point in even hoping for it.

But then, despite the odds, despite the fact that he was probably undeserving, he was here. He was here with him, for him. 

What do you say? If you even can, which he couldn’t. Ian barely managed to mutter out, “Holy fuck.” 

But he always seemed so sure; if he was nervous, there was no way you would’ve known. He’s flirting with you, smirking at you, sprawling out on the bottom bunk for you. 

Then there’s that...heat. That need. It’s been awhile since he’s felt it, but he can pinpoint the exact last time. In a stolen car on the side of the road on the way to Mexico. That’s when. 

Ian’s on top of him now, breathing hard. He knows he probably looks strung out- can you have withdrawals from another person? 

And he’s so beautiful. Just like always. He’s looking back at you like you’ve just given him everything- when really it’s the opposite. 

Ian wants to kiss him, wants to kiss him SO bad. But he waits for the go ahead, he owes him at least that. He gives it, leaning in, and Ian takes it and runs with it. 

Then they’ve both come down, and he’s putting his jumpsuit back on. The shock is beginning to wear off, and Ian starts to feel angry. 

“How could you let yourself get put back here Mickey? You were fucking free!” He yells, louder than he intends. 

He raises those goddamn eyebrows, the most expressive pair he’s ever seen. “No I fucking wasn’t. Sure, I wasn’t locked up, but I sure as hell wasn’t free.” 

“You were working for a cartel? You really thought that was a good idea? You couldn’t have kept your hands clean for five fucking minutes?” Ian knew he was out of line, but he couldn’t help it. 

“Fuck you, you don’t know what it was like. You weren’t fucking there remember?” Mickey snapped, and then immediately looked guilty.

Ian couldn’t hold back the tears. Mickey was right, he wasn’t there. He left him. He has no right to be angry about any of it. “I’m so sorry.” 

Mickey immediately went to the bed where Ian was sitting and straddled his lap. “No, I’m sorry. I told myself I wasn’t going to do that. Ian, we can’t live in the past. I’ve been through so much shit to get back here and be with you. But none of it matters now. This is all I wanted, okay?” 

Ian looked up at him with watery, red eyes. “I love you. Please tell me you know that.” 

Mickey smiled and laid a kiss to his temple. “I know. Let’s just go to sleep okay? It’s been a long fucking day for both of us.” 

“But we have so much to talk about. I want to hear everything, even the stuff you’re already planning on keeping from me.” Ian accused with a small smile. 

“We have plenty of time for that shit. Lay down with me asshole.” Mickey smiled back and immediately assumed little spoon position. 

So now here he was, this is real. And he couldn’t believe it.

Mickey was still fast asleep, breathing deeply. Ian began to cry, tears streaming down his face without his permission. He tried to keep his sobs down, he didn’t want to wake Mickey up. But he should’ve known that was pointless. 

Mickey starts to awaken, making small movements and small sighs. Once he realizes what’s going on behind him, he immediately flips around. 

“Ian, hey, why are you crying?” His face shows such genuine concern that it makes Ian cry even harder. 

He can’t respond, he just keeps crying. In the back of his mind he knows he should feel embarrassed but in the moment he doesn’t care. Mickey still looks extremely alarmed and places his warm hand on Ian’s cheek, stroking the tears as they fall. He places kisses on his forehead, whispering “shhh, it’s okay. I know, it’s okay.” 

After a minute or so more of this, Ian finally gets himself together enough to speak. “You always save me. Every time. Why?” His eyes so watery and earnest as he peers into Mickey’s. 

“Because I love you.” Mickey stares back, looking so sure and calm that Ian’s heart bursts. 

“Why?” Ian looks away. He hates that he has to ask, but he needs to know. 

“Because you’re it for me, man. No matter where I go, how much time goes by, it doesn’t go away.” Again, looking so sure and calm. How is this the same boy he fell in love with when he was fifteen? 

“I don’t deserve you.” Ian says quietly, staring down at his chest, still unable to meet his eyes. 

Mickey grabs his face in his hands, and kisses him hard. 

“Too fucking bad.”

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed! please please leave comments for suggestions on what I should write next- i would like to keep exploring the prison endgame world and just milk that dry lmao. but ideas for oneshots or even multichaps are much appreciated!!


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